low white count and lower platelets

i had a blood draw and onc's appt. this week. my platelets have dropped by more than 20,000 from 89,000 (which is low) to in the 61,000ish. if it gets below 50,000 i go on a holiday from the gleevec. the fact that my platelet count is that low scares me, as does the idea of a "holiday" leaving all those nasty mutated cells running around my body with nothing to stop them. i have another blood draw in about a week and half, we'll see what happens then i guess.

also, my white blood cell count has now dropped below normal levels. 4500 is the lowest that is considered normal. mine is sitting at 3200. not sure how low that can get before i gets actually dangerous. however, my absolute neutrophil count, which is not quite low yet, is 2.1. bottom of normal is 1.8, and below 1 is scary dangerous. (like i have no immune system at all and i won't be allowed to eat anything raw at all, and i'll have to wear a mask to go out in public. all this scares me quite a lot, because as i said, i don't want to start bleeding uncontrollably, or get every infection that comes my way; BUT i also am afraid to be off my meds, since they are what is keeping me from heading toward a blast crisis.

my onc (dr robinson is my only onc still-- i'm hoping to get to raleigh in january to see a new hematologist) seems very lackadaisical about it all. not surprising, he seems a bit that way about everything.

i told him i was having significant hip pain tho and he sent me for x-rays. a bit silly really. i knew it was musculoskeletal pain caused by the gleevec. i've done way too much research at this point. it scares me that i feel like i know more than my oncologist about my own disease. oh well. so, i'm to go back to my GP if the pain continues (it seems to have mostly stopped for the moment) and then she'll likely refer me to another specialist. except that my plan is different. unless the pain becomes absolutely unbearable, i'm going to deal with it until i get to the hematologist.

i know i've made reference to a knitting project i'm working on to submit to a magazine. i finished the prototype tonight! it's awesome, but i can't say more than that for now. i'll let you know when i can. i made yarn calenders to sell at the shop (and online if people are interested). they are gorgeous!

isn't it lovely? all are castle fibers yarn (for those who don't know--i started castle fibers about 6 years ago and have been dyeing yarn and fiber and selling them ever since) and i'm LOVING how they came out. things at the shop are going ok, and my energy level is up some. (YAY).

onward to pattern writing! i'll fill you in when i can. hugs