oddities

today i realized that one of the many oddities of leukemia is that my sense of smell is a bit "overactive". which would be fine, except of course that my stomach is easily upset.... i'm sure you can see where this is leading. at the shop, this morning, i noticed an odd smell ( i suspect it was hot plastic from the tee-shirt shop next door) that made me feel quite nauseated. not pleasant. not at all. i had noticed this "too much smell" thing some months ago but assumed that the gleevec had perhaps stopped it. not so much i guess.

the project i'm working on to submit to JAK 2012 had to be ripped back and restarted because i mismeasured my swatch by 1/2 a stitch, which would seem not so much. but when it's over a large measurement like 36 inches, and i have an extra inch of knitting for every 20-30 stitches, it adds up fast.

today a knitting group met at the yarn shop. they were lovely ladies who purchased a bunch of ruffle-y yarn. glad i got it in. i had hoped to have it in when they were here!

my tongue is hurting again, not on the side, but on the very tip today. being very careful about brushing my teeth multiple times a day has made a big difference tho. thank goodness. haven't heard anything about the low platelet count. apparently it isn't low enough to be a big concern. in the end, it's been a pretty normal day. i like those. i'll take more of 'em any day!

just another day

so, i didn't take my diuretic yesterday, and today my tongue feels normal-sized. it's amazing how good "normal" feels sometimes.

i restarted my Jane Austen project because i mismeasured my swatch and came out several inches too big. that's bad. so, i frogged the whole thing and started again, only smaller.

we went out to mistletoe ranch in hill city today. it was fun. i  found some nifty stuff for the shop window and bought some fabric to make some small gifts.

i'm feeling ok this evening other than some hip and knee pain. it's weird having cancer because i never know what to blame on cancer and what is something else.

today tho, today was pretty normal feeling... and now i'm off to bed!

losing my mind?

yup, i think i may be losing my mind. i am voluntarily going out on the sunday after thanksgiving and going shopping. what the heck am i thinking?

so, friday and saturday were good shopping days at the yarn shop. lots of business, some orders that i need to send in on monday :-)  i'm quite pleased with it actually.

today, we are headed out to a few stores to look for christmas-y type stuff and then the plan is for a mid-afternoon lunch at olive garden. the whole family is going, and most scary of all, i'm actually looking forward to this.

i'm not taking my diuretic today, which would be a day that i should (it is prescribed every other day for swelling as needed), because i sort of think that it is causing my swollen tongue. this is my latest, greatest issue that is going on. my tongue is regularly feeling too large for my mouth. i suspect that it is actually too large for my mouth because my molars on the left side of my mouth are rubbing a raw spot on the side of my tongue. which undoubtedly makes it more swollen which probably makes my tongue rub on my teeth more. a never ending cycle so far. at any rate, apparently this is a possible allergic reaction to lasix, so i'm going to not take it today, and then tomorrow i'll call my GP and see if she can suggest anything, since my onc is out of town til at least tuesday.

additionally, i have a whole lot of bruises on the fronts of my legs. i imagine that is is the result of my low platelet count, but perhaps not. it's really hard to know until i talk to my onc.

my hair continues to get thinner, altho it started so thick that it is now really "normal" looking, which for me feels incredibly thin. it's regularly disturbing tho because of the sheer amount of hair loss.

oh i forgot to tell you all how impressed i am with my GP. i said that i had called her at 6am on thanksgiving--and she talked to me. and helped reassure me that i was probably going to be ok in spite of the amazing amount of blood. better tho, she called me about 10 to make sure that i was ok. and suggested that i pass on the lasix while i was menstruating because it makes me light headed a bit, and that the blood loss might also. for someone who has had me in her office exactly twice, she is a truly lovely and caring person. need a GP in rapid city? go to her. she's amazing.

i'm going to call a dr onc in north carolina tomorrow and see if i can get in to see him sometime in early jan. preferably. that should give us time to get a plane ticket at a decent price (i'll be looking into the possibility of someone helping pay because it's for a dr.--there's several programs that do such things). additionally, as much as i need to go to a specialist for my own sanity, i also need to try to make my kid's lives as normal as possible, and anything sooner than january won't do that.

so my morning routine is sort of bizarre lately. i spend a lot of time running to the bathroom. gleevec is wreaking havoc on my digestive system, so i visit the bathroom probably 8 times every morning....it isn't unbearable, just inconvenient. and it makes me glad that i work for myself, since it would be hard to hold a job like at the library working reference desk or teaching with this kind of situation. i can't wait when i have to go. i do wonder how people in this situation handle things when they are out teaching or whatever. i feel really blessed that i don't have to do that right now.

what i'm thankful for

so, i had intended on posting this yesterday, but life interferred and there was yesterday's post instead. so i'll post this today. yesterday, it got busy and i didn't around to writing it, meant to in the morning when i posted the other.

i spent my day being incredibly thankful that i wasn't trying to figure out how to make this thanksgiving especially wonderful because it might be my last one with my kids. i'm incredibly thankful that dr. babbit figured out what was wrong without delay, and that i had a diagnosis as fast as was realistically possible. i'm thankful that even tho dr. robinson is not "my kind of doctor" and i don't want to keep going to him, that he was here and knew the right meds and got me right on them. and that in all of that, it is 2011 and not 1995--when i would have been told to get my life in order because i had 3-5 years to live. and those years would not be pleasant ones either. painful, dr filled, bone marrow transplantation filled ones. i'm really thankful to alive today when amazing strides have been made, and when more are being made daily. i had a biologist friend tell me after looking at how gleevec and it's second generation drugs work, that he was sure there'd be a CURE in the next 10 years. a CURE. it would be amazing in a few years if instead of planning a funeral, if i could say i USED to have leukemia.

i'm thankful for my family who gathered around when they found out i was sick and because they are amazing supportive people. and my family that i chose did the same. i'm amazing thankful that my SCA family is filled with wonderful supportive people who let me complain when i needed to. and that they are my friends.

when i got the diagnosis i wondered a bit about what i had done to deserve having leukemia. perhaps the more relevent point would be to wonder what i did to deserve such amazing friends and family and luck as to have been diagnosed today instead of 20 years ago. thanks guys.... i look forward to 40 or 50 more days like today! it's the best.

TMI post--menstruation and bleeding.

so, it's a scary morning... or was. this is all going to be gross and TMI for many. don't read further if you're queasy or squidgy about blood.

so--yesterday i had a blood draw. went in at 8:30am and because i was puffy from the edema, and likely dehydrated from the diuretic, they had a hard time getting to a vein. one stick in the elbow, some digging. no blood. i suggested the back of my hand. i hate the digging. while the back of my hand hurts while they do it, it is usually pretty straight forward. anyway, they got some blood. left a nice bruise in my elbow and i went home.

oh, and when i got up, my period had started a couple of days earlier than i expected. no real cramps, just my typical super-hunger empty feeling. the no cramps is way not typical for me. anyway...

i realized earlyish that i was bleeding somewhat heavier than usual. i use a menstrual cup, not pads or tampons, so i can actually see how much i'm bleeding, and i was definitely bleeding more than average, but i didn't think much about it. typical bleeding from a period is about 35-80 ml (for those interested in numbers) and the cup i use hold about 30 ml. i usually empty the cup every 12 hours like they suggest and for the first day, i expect a half full cup, then it peters out to nothing within a couple of days.

so, a couple of hours into my day i empty a half full cup. (see, i'm an optomist!). later i empty it about half full again. so far i'm not too worried, but i did think it was a bit heavy.

at 3pm i call the cancer clinic to ask about results of my blood draw. the nurse who calls me back says "i don't have any results of blood work for you today". i say, "i had a blood draw this morning. i just wanted to know the results". they always seem surprised that i want to know. makes me wonder what kind of patients they usually deal with to be honest, but that's another story. so she pulls up results, and says "what do you want to know?" i say "oh i was just curious". "you're platelets are low", "oh, ok, what are my white and red counts?" normal range. i think she told me what my platelet counts was, but i'm not positive. anyway.... i say thanks, she says she'll print out the results and show dr robinson on tuesday. he's out of town until then. i'm a bit confused honestly, why they bothered with a routine blood draw that no one was going to look at the results of for a week, but whatever....

so, i'm a bit worried at this point, enough to call my GP and ask if she can call me back. unfortunately a nurse (or someone) calls me back about 5:15 after my GP has already gone home. darn... no info there.

so, i'm up and down for the evening, making butterhorns (YUMMMM) and going to knit night and out for french toast after, and i get home and as i stand up from the car, i can feel a "leak" from the menstrual cup. this is odd, because in 7 years of use i've only ever leaked twice. both times i had an extremely late period (like by several weeks or more) and kind of clotty bleeding that made me think perhaps i had had a very early miscarriage--both were overnight. anyway... so i go inside and go to empty the cup, and it is full. completely full. and the blood is really thin. no viscosity to it whatsoever. it is kind of the texture of water, but really red colored. and it has no typical menstrual blood smell.

this worried me a bit, but not too much. i comment on it to my hub and leave it at that. then an hour later, i got check and the cup is 1/3 full already. an hour later it is again. this is starting to scare me. BUT, it's the wednesday before thanksgiving, and by now it's 11pm and other than going to the ER, there is nothing to do, and right then i was NOT willing. so, i dump right before bed, put on a pad because i'm sure i'll have leakage and go to bed. i woke up at 4:30 with diarrhea. UGH. and leakage. completely full cup. i have to practically take a shower to clean up the blood on my hands (ok this is an exageration but still).

so at 6am i call my GP who is a most lovely lady, who on diagnosis gave me her home phone and said to call whenever if i needed something. she says that it will probably subside, that it is not likely related to the platelet count (which if it was dangerously low they should have given me platelets--i didn't point out that they hadn't looked at the results until i called and that my onc hadn't seen them yet). she says that as long as i can deal with it, if it's not running over every 2 hours, i should be ok. but if it is then off to the ER i should go.

this is not how meant to spend thanksgiving morning. not at all. i'll keep you updated as i find things out.

gone away, gone ahead

when i heard that Anne McCaffrey died, it brought tears to my eyes. Dragonsong and Dragonsinger were and perhaps still are two of the best books i've ever read. they touched me in ways i can't explain. i was a socially awkward girl who loved music--not surprising that i felt a kinship with Menolly and by proxy with Anne.

her stories taught me that it was ok to be awkward. that it was ok to be a daydreamer. that it was wonderful to write little twiddles. i play harp today because of anne and menolly. i started writing music in SCA inspired in some part by menolly. i can never thank her in this world, but i hope she is somewhere as sweet as the places her stories took me, and i hope she is riding dragons!

the truth is...

So, i have been contemplating some social realities lately. It’s interesting. i encounter people occasionally who say mean things to people with the claim that they are just being "brutally honest". These people regularly suggest that they are better people than others for their "honesty". The thing is, saying rude stuff to people, being "brutally honest", etc.... that just makes you a rude person, a socially inept person, a person with "no class".

these same people often suggest that those who do not say rude things to people's faces when they don't care for the person, or don't care for what the person has done, are two-faced for being polite to people. It occurred to me recently that these people, they are just polite people. There are two people in my life, that i encounter very occasionally, that i know do not care for me much. They do not act like we are best friends when we meet, but they are polite and pleasant. Occasionally in the past i have been hurt by that behavior, thinking in my head that "i thought we were friends" and then finding out that indeed we were not. i have to say suddenly, i realize a few things and i have to apologize to them for my bad thoughts about them.

I realize that they are no more or less my friends because they say things to others that are not totally complimentary of me. Perhaps they think of me as their friend, perhaps they do not. I’ve no idea. But being polite to people's faces, that just means you are a polite person with class. I have to acknowledge that even my "true friends", people that i sincerely like and enjoy spending time with regularly bug the crap out of me. I like them. I treat them nicely when i'm dealing with them because well, i actually do like them. i vent occasionally about them so that i continue to treat them nicely and be friends with them. This, i think makes me a normal person. And the being polite thing... it makes me polite. it means I’m being decent. Often the things that annoy me are not universal things that annoy all people, nor do those very things annoy me all the time, so telling them "this thing you do, it is annoying" would not be "nice" nor would it be helpful.

Now, this is not to say that there are not ways of being two-faced. if someone says they are my best friend to my face and tells me they love my new haircut, but behind my back tell someone else that they think i am a horrible jerk and that they hate my hair cut and that they hope that i fail in my life... that is two-faced, and i don't like it, and when i find out about that, i'm not going to consider that person my friend anymore. But it won't be because they were polite to my face; it'll be because they behaved in completely contradictory ways. And I don’t like that. And honestly, that reminds me far too much of junior high, a time that I’d prefer never to repeat.

The thing that is problematic is that people who are rude to people’s faces, they believe that all people in life behave this way. They do not understand that their behavior is not honest, it’s just rude, and they assume that all people who are polite to their faces are their friends, so when they find that people say not such nice things behind their backs, they feel betrayed. Only often they have had no real indication that those people are truly their friends.

The lesson that I’ve learned lately is pretty simple, whether people consider me their friends or not, the people that i would like to deal with are the polite ones.  Whether those people are truly my friends or not I’d rather deal with people that are polite to me. Honestly, the ones that claim to be my friends, but then are rude whenever they get upset, I don’t want to deal with them, even if they think they are my friend. I’m pretty sure I don’t need friends like that. I’ll take the polite people that really aren’t my friends any day. At least those people are easy to deal with day-to-day. They don’t make me worry about the next time I see them, if they will be polite or not. So, to those couple of people that I thought bad stuff about—I’m so sorry. Thanks for being polite and pleasant to deal with, even when you don’t really like me. And honestly I appreciate the lie… (if that’s what one wants to call it). It makes it easier to be around you.  And it makes you a far classier person!  Interestingly enough…it makes me wish that we were friends. HUGS….

well then....

sometimes it is incredibly difficult to remain positive. i am reminded of that poem: "If you can keep your head when all about you are losing theirs and blaming it on you..." it's by Rudyard Kipling... title "If". the shire is once again attempting to blow up. you know what, i'm tired of it.

one way or the other, i'm breathing deeply, and trying to stay calm and collected and uninvolved. it is not my problem. i keep saying this. :::it is not my problem::: i cannot change what other people do. i cannot change how they act. i can only change how i react. and in this case, there is no reason to react because, repeat it with me, THIS IS NOT MY PROBLEM.

in other news, the diuretic seems to be helping with the swelling. i'm down to 178, and my rings are back to falling off. interestingly my tongue feels too big for my mouth today. it's odd. not sure what's going on with that. i also have a bunch of bruises on my legs, which worries me at least a bit. i'll be asking about it at my appt on wednesday.

i didn't open the shop today because it snowed quite a lot and generally i find that no one shops on the first good snow of the year. it was cold, i didn't feel great, and it snowed about a foot or more. i figured that staying home and drinking tea and working on my sweater was a better use of my time (and energy).

otherwise than the negativity that is NOT MY PROBLEM, my day was lovely and warm and pleasant, hope yours was too... stay warm and dry!

thanks and changes in store

i realized looking in the mirror this morning that i was seeing a face i had not realized i had let back into my life. she was a face that lived in my life years ago, that i had gotten rid of, i thought permenently. oddly enough this realization came in a funny way. i went to our local SCA meeting and there were some very negative nellies there. i said to my hub "if they're going to be so negative, why do they bother showing up, why can't they just leave?" this morning i looked in the mirror and saw how far down that path i had gone in my life. i suspect it started long before my diagnosis, but that sort of pushed me over the edge into a virtual free-fall.

to those who hung out with anyway, and tolerated me, thanks. i appreciate all you've done, and know that it was undoubtedly hard to stand by and watch. unfortunately, as a wise person pointed out this morning: telling someone "the stove is hot" only goes so far, and kids and adults usually have to learn those kinds of lessons for themselves. i appreciate you all letting me find my way back to myself and to home and waiting for me to get there. i may need an occassional reminder so that i don't go back to my pity party, but if you would, make it a positive one?

i've made some positive decisions to make sure that all the responsibilities that need taking care of are taken care of, and as such i'm no longer regional exchecquer. the job needs to be done, and right now i need to devote my energy to things that no one else can do for me, and this is one that someone else can do. (thank goodness for that).

i've called a doctor in Raleigh NC who is a leukemia specialist. i'm working on getting in to see him. hopefully sometime after the new year. this is a positive move for me. i want to feel good and positive about my care, and plan to move in that direction from now on. being my own best advocate, i have recognized that i need to go to a doctor that i trust and believe in, so, i'm working toward that. :-).

in Schattentor, i intend to be a positive resource. the point of SCA is to have fun and have events. making money is a occassional plus, but not only not necessary, but not even a goal of the organization, hence the "not-for-profit" status that we hold. we have enough money currently to run the shire for several years without making any money at all. i'm not relying on that, but i'm going to not worry substantially about making money, because when one focuses on that, it is difficult to see the bigger goal of actually reenacting the middle ages, educating ourselves and others and having fun in the process. i have thought for a really long time that we need to be far less concerned about events making money. SCA needs to look outside of SCA to make most of its money. hold rummage sales, charge a small fee for demos, etc. instead of trying to make every event produce money from our own members.

as such, i'm planning on a Schattentor rummage sale for spring. we'll host it at our house, just off west blvd and half the money will be donated to schattentor, the other half to the endowment fund. if you've got stuff you don't want or aren't using (not SCA stuff, just stuff), consider sorting through it and donating it to this rummage sale. if you aren't in schattentor i challenge you to do the same! let's see Northshield fully endow the fund! it's a valid goal, and i intend to make it mine to see that this happens, not when someone dies (that's a far too negative idea) but now, while i'm alive! who's with me?

i'm setting myself some goals. one is to get my harp in tune and start playing it for a little while each day. another is to publish a knitting pattern. i have a fabulous plan for something to submit to the 2012 Jane Austen Knits of Interweave. http://www.knittingdaily.com/blogs/jane_austen_knits/archive/2011/10/13/call-for-entries-jane-austen-knits-2012.aspx
i'm not allowed to blog about the thing, but look for it soon, when i am allowed to. i'm positive my idea will work and be fabulous!

i'm debating about whether to attend boar's head in milwaukee or not. i think i might be able to swing it, i haven't decided yet for sure tho! who else is going? and if i managed to get to minneapolis, is there someone i could ride on from there with perhaps?

anyway.... thanks to all and hugs around!

too much

lately, today especially, i feel like i am incapable of dealing with the responsibilities i have. so in the next couple of days (i have tomorrow off) i'm going to do some soul searching and decide what things i can handle, and which i just can't do right now. this is not personal to anyone or anything. i am just feeling the difficulty of being sick, and feeling like i live life in a fog, and feeling like such an imposition on so many people.

some things will have to change. some responsibilities that i took on when i didn't know i was sick, or how sick i was, will have to go away. i need less going on in my life right now.

this blog is the one place i feel like i can actually express my feelings right now, so if you don't like what you're reading i'm very sorry. please let me say what i must in at least one place in my life.

ugh

today is a bad day. i hate them. i've spent most of the day in bed feeling lousy. i meant to have a start on criminal minds yarn done a couple of days ago, but now i'm hoping to get it started by tomorrow. yeah, i'm so damned tired of all of this. the diarrhea is back full force along with nausea and neck pain and swollen glands in my neck. the rash is still hanging around as is the edema, which is sort of an all-over swollen feeling.

i can't sleep, i'm freezing cold, i can't concentrate very well. guess i'll take a bath and hope when i'm warmer i'll feel more functional.

morning face

and hands.... so, when i was diagnosed with CML i weighed about 174 pounds, give or take. (wish it was less, but there it is). this morning i weighed myself--2 months in and i weigh about 182 or so. i had settled into weighing about 178 until a couple of days ago--like water retention. but now i have gain another 4 pounds, undoubtedly also edema since my rings and face are hugely swollen each morning. by evening it has moved to my legs and feet. it's not pleasant, but i've been told nothing will be done until i gain at least 10 pounds. i was really hoping i'd stick with 178, and just be able to ignore it.

additionally, my most recent odd symptom has developed. i am having fairly significant pain at the base of my neck. not like stiffness from bad posture, like pain. i'm not sure what that'll turn out to be, but when i call about the added edema, i'll report it as well. i don't have an appt for a blood draw for another 10 days or so.

tomorrow, my plan is to call the leukemia specialist in Raleigh NC (that's where my sister lives so i'll have a place to stay) and see if i can get an appt. to see him. i feel like i really need to see a specialist who knows more than dr. robinson (or dr. coldfish as my mother called him).  You need to understand that this comment from my mother is really shocking. she generally looks for the best in people, and seldom gets upset with people and i don't know that i've ever heard her call someone a name before. EVER. in 44 years. so, this, this is the ultimate insult.

my hope is that he'll be able to look over my records that i will be able to wait to see him until Jan sometime, so that our holidays won't be any more disrupted than necessary. of course, in an emergency--if he thinks things are going badly (which i doubt will happen) i guess i'll be on a plane and there before thanksgiving. in the meantime--i'm living with these side effects, as well as the symptoms i'm still having, because the alternative--it's far worse! hugs everyone....

so yeah....

Lately i feel like such a complainer. i don't mean to be. but if feels like right after one stupid side effect sort of eases up, another one jumps in to take its place. the latest in the list is bone and or muscle pain. it's hard to know exactly which, but one way or the other, last night i started having these odd stabbing pains deep inside my limbs. mostly it was in my right lower arm, but also my other arm and some in my right lower leg. before i went to bed i took some advil (which i'm supposed to be careful about ) and tylenol (which i'm also supposed to be very careful about) so that i could get some sleep. i slept restlessly, and woke up feeling pretty cruddy.

thank good for amanda on these days. because she is home and her only job is helping at the shop she was able to fill in this morning for me, and then i'm in this pm. i'm feeling far better now, altho this morning the cold feet and hands thing kicked me in the butt.

i've had issues with cold hands and feet since i was 19 and diagnosed with Raynaud's disease. this is a pecular disease where the my hands and feet turn white when exposed to cold, then if they stay cold long enough they'll turn blue. (i try not to ever let that happen). they feel not quite but almost numb, then when they warm up they get red and it feels pins and needles and painful. basically the vessels in my extremities tend to spasm in response to cold (and stress sometimes). additionally now, anemia (which is often a side effect of gleevec apparently) causes similar symptoms, so i'm suffereing from a double dose of really cold hands and feet. to the degree where part of the time they just won't warm up unless i take a hot bath. this morning i took a hot shower to try to get warmed up, my hands and feet got warm but immediately were cold again when i got out. as i write, i have a little space heater that i usually only use when it is really cold out, and i've got it blowing on my feet which are really cold.

the edema continues. my face is generally quite swollen when i get up, it seems to let up within an hour or two tho. but by evening my feet and legs are swollen and sore.  so it goes. the rash is irritating, litterly, but nothing unlivable, just a bother. the nausea--well, it goes on as well. luckily the diarrhea  does seem to be back under control. none of it is stuff that will kill me like untreated CML will, but none is fun. and all of it changes my life in ways i am having trouble accepting...

ginger tea

gleevec seems to be doing it's job (my last WBC was 6,000 ish) and for that i am extremely grateful. what i'm dealing with now is two particular side effects: nausea and edema. the edema is particularly unpleasant in the morning when my face and hands are swollen (the skin on my face often hurts and my rings which are generally really loose are too tight). they say i can't take diuretics because my blood pressure is just too low. and i don't want to deal with the blacking out thing when i stand up too fast, i already do that and anymore would be less than pleasant. for the nausea tho, i've been trying ginger tea and mint tea and they do seem to be helping some. i seem to have settled in at retaining about 4 or so pounds of extra water. not pleasant but livable.

this weekend leah and i trotted off to Rhythm and Bruise in Fargo. it was fun, altho i don't know that i'd ever buy another Japanese feast. didn't appeal to me at all. and there was no singing :( sad but true.

i'm still feeling the results of the trip, with more exhaustion than normal. and my brain fog is unpleasant. i hate feeling stupid.

i got a lovely LOVELY prayer shawl from a friend when i got back. it is warm and soft and the perfect thing to wrap up in on a cold evening.  i'll post pics in the next day or two. i need to send off a thank you note, i just haven't had the energy/inspiration yet at the right moment. so, publicly, thanks amy.... i love it!

hot flashes are back this week... along with cold cold feet and hands. it is particularly odd when they both strike at once and the back of my neck is burning up but my hands and feet feel like ice cubes.

walked home from work today in the sunshine. the sky is still blue and even tho it is quite chilly and all the leaves are down, it is still a lovely fall day. look for new yarn colorways in my etsy store soon.... penelope garcia and morgan.... look out! they're gonna be gorgeous.

good things

Stephen (my 17 year old son) made all state choir in SD this year, so on Saturday we drove 5 hours to Sioux Falls to hear him sing. the concert was amazing. and uplifting. First the all-state orchestra performed. i like orchestra... it has always appealed to me a bit more than band, altho i've always been in band and never been in an orchestra. they played a piece by Dr. Yarbrough, a former teacher of mine. it was lovely, and he was there, so i got to chat with him a bit.

then the choir sang. to begin with, let me just say that there is something truly amazing about listening to 932 voices, all performing the same piece at the same time. and well. south dakota has a unique system of all-state choir. they allow all schools to bring at least 1 and up to 5 quartets. these quartets must be comprised of a soprano, alto, tenor and bass. this results in an amazing large choir that is quite balanced. the choir comes together and rehearses on friday and saturday and then does this mass choir concert. it is always impressive, but this was more impressive than most.  Vijay Singh was the guest director and it was obvious from how the students reacted that he was a hit with them. when you listen to a choir that is truly excited about the pieces they are singing and the director, the fun is infectious.

they sang 3 pieces that he had composed, and one in particular that was truly touching. i have never before jumped up after a piece to applaud because i was inspired to do so. ever. but this, this made me do so. it was their final piece alone and titled "Carpenters of God". i wish i could post a link to their performance, but since i can't here's a different peformance with Dr. Singh talking about his composition beforehand http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w73FXtOYFOw . the piece here is more "expertly" performed perhaps, but something about the vast size and huge range of an almost 1000 person choir singing it was more impressive. even if it was in an ice arena. when he got done, he ran around the bleachers where the choir was standing and got them to do the wave! what fun.

then they sang Battle Hymn of the Republic, which made me cry some more. it was a wonderful weekend. the kind there should be more of. my mom was here visiting and so got to go along and hear her grandson sing. all and all, it was a lovely weekend.

if you have kids, hug them today....make today wonderful, because tomorrow is uncertain.